I didn't know him,
his existence and presence never in mind.
Yet somehow our lives,
Strangely and eventually became entwined.
I knew Slutty Sarah,
just as everyone does.
She slept with Mickey Molar,
well... just because.
Now Mickey had this dentist,
whom pulled out all his back teeth:
a dentist named Lack Luster Larry,
a molar pulling thief.
Larry's looks were forgettable,
just ask his ex wife.
It lead to their divorce,
and Move-on Malinda's new life.
Malinda's second marriage canned,
like the third, forth and fifth.
So she hired Yiddish Yente,
to see whom she'd be matched with.
Yente knew women and men,
she knew many straight, many gay.
She even knew Nancy Opel,
who played Yente on Broadway.
Nancy has also done TV,
including every Law & Order.
And like Bolder Bowling Bill,
She grew up on a border.
Bill loved his Kansas bowling,
which is done with rocks not balls.
His stiffest competition:
none other than Walter Waterfalls.
Walter cried like a baby,
every time he lost a rolling round.
Which angered Janitor Jerry,
who mopped his tears off the ground.
Jerry was a simple man,
who did as he was told.
Unlike his wife Commanding Camilla,
who controlled the young and the old.
Camilla was a Principal,
and read bingo numbers Wednesday nights.
She worked with Doorman Darrel,
who broke-up all the old people fights.
Darrel was surprised by old-folk scuffles,
and broke them up with care.
For he had heard all the stories,
of Mr. Hulking Harry Hair.
With green hair and large muscles,
Harry once knocked an old lady down.
The lady's son Victory Verdict Vincent,
got green Hair cut from the town.
Vincent leads us to our destination,
his oddest client, which everyone agrees.
The case of the missing lower joints,
the case of Neil No Knees.