Friday, November 21, 2008

She's Your Everything. Does She Know?

There are many times in relationships when it is standard practice to get your lover a gift. There are days when we give that special someone a gift because it is the set aside day for doing so. Valentine's day is a great example. Be romantic, thoughtful, and giving on this specific day simply because it is tradition. Other days like this include birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries, and of course Memorial day.

These days may be set aside as gift giving times and days to make your tag team partner feel special, but they are not the only days to do good by them. Gentlemen, more often we should make our girlfriends or wives feel special by doing something unique for them, or getting them something to keep upside down frowns in place. She is our everything, yet we do nothing. I submit my top 3 ways to say:

You are special and I love you.

1. A Pineapple

Pineapples are legit! Don't hate just yet on this exotic fruit turned Spongebob home. A pineapple is a great gift for women. It is affordable, makes a room smell great and they can eat it when they get a craving for a healthy snack (this blog isn't for guys with fat girlfriends). Plus, when you get a large ripe pineapple, it has a tall plume and looks like a unique lovely flower-like plant. So in a way, you are getting them a flower-like gift, yet still making it trendy and different to make your lady feel special. Feel free to follow this gift up with a ham pizza. Nothing says "I love you" like a do it yourself Hawaiian style pizza.

2. Coloring Books/Mad Libs

When you stop at a gas station nest, run in and pick up some coloring books with cute memorable cartoon characters on it. She'll forget about your obsession with fantasy football and remember that time the 2 of you sat through an episode of "Blue's Clues" just to see who would figure out the mystery first. Mad Libs are also good choices. For every noun, adjective, or verb write in a variation of love. Also, while at the gas station, you might as well pick up a his and hers Mickey's 40oz. Chicks dig duel malt liquors.

3. Diamonds

Blow her mind. It isn't Valentine's day and you are not proposing, yet you still got her diamonds? They really are beautiful. Matching them up with your beauty is a perfect way to do what's right for the world. Some may argue that there are African nations where people are killed over diamonds; well personally, I would slaughter all of Africa for one diamond on my lover. Does that make me racist? No. There are white people in South Africa. The main thing is: women love diamonds and continents of people being murdered.

Readers must know that I have loved and lost. Maybe I didn't do these things often enough or at all, but that doesn't mean they still shouldn't be done...especially the murdering of Africans. These ideas work. Please use them...because I may not get the opportunity to use them myself.

This blog is dedicated to my love. I'm sorry and I love you.

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